What is “Thought Talk?”

Last week I spoke about practicing thought talk before being plunged into the darkness of our reactions and regrets.

I was asked what “thought talk” is, so here is an explanation:

In order to be able to practice controlled responses and behaviors in highly charged situations, we need to be able to step back and analyze what is going on in our heads versus analyzing what is happening around us.

We can only do this effectively if we have practiced. Practicing involves bringing to mind a reaction we had, that took us by surprise, and asking questions like:

What is going on in my head in that moment? What was my biggest fear? Was it humiliation, loss, loss of control, what? How likely was the feared outcome? What if my worst fear happened? Would it be that bad? How likely would things develop in that direction? Would that be so bad? Is the “utter devastation” really going to happen? Is that as bad as you think it would be?

Your questioning should be relentless, like a two-year-old, until you have moved your thought pattern from panic to calm. As I said, it isn’t a once and done event. Our reactionary thought patterns are extremely well developed, so you have to be extremely dedicated to breaking the pattern with daily practices and frequent review.

I help leaders find strategies that work for them in situations they usually react in. Contact me if you want to lead from a place of inner control and calm.

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